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Things move so fast in New York that I only recently stopped to ask myself how I’d wound up here, over 35 and still single, but not always wanting to be. I’d already crossed the fuck-it-something's-got-to-give threshold of my New York dating life. If this trip had been a blind date, I would’ve walked out of the bar the second I saw New Bern’s offerings, via a terrifying night of Tindering.

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But just 15% of the 35 million hacked records released in August belonged to women, and it was found that the adulterous dating website had created 70,000 bots to impersonate women and send messages to men on the site.

Meanwhile, a 2015 study of the 91 million people who use location-based digital matchmaking apps, such as Tinder and Hinge, found that 62% of users are men.

Ashley Madison is an extreme example of this male-heavy ratio.

Prior to the July hack, the adulterous dating website claimed that 30% of its clients were female.

There’s a built-in asymmetry which, to my intuition as a psychology, would explain why you get more men than women joining the sites.

But though men dominate online dating overall, a profile of specific dating sites gives a more nuanced picture.

From what I could glean, the local servers, bartenders, and chefs in town just sleep with one another.

“Downtown, there’s lots of friends with benefits,” says Paul, a 24-year-old sous chef.

One dating app, The Inner Circle, has banned women in London from joining for one month, to try and even out its gender ratio.

Roughly 60% of the app’s 18,000 UK members are female, and further women will be blocked from joining until Oct 2.

To be in constant chase is exhausting, and to repeat it, at ’s behest, every 48 to 72 hours in six very different U. I’d estimate that 85 percent of the profiles I saw, with my radius set at 30 miles around New Bern, featured guns, military uniforms (there are two bases nearby), Confederate flags, mentions of God, or all of the above.