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Ladies, do not just sit back and wait to be contacted.Let your fingers do the walking and when you spot persons of interest, do not hesitate to contact them.

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To let a person know you are interested in him or her you can select an option some sites calls a wink or a tease.

While this allows you to be coy and indicate interest, it does not require you to put yourself on the line to reveal or say anything about yourself.

Talking about yourself, at this point, should be limited, and related to the person you're interested in.**Bonus advice: Never, for the love of god, describe yourself (whether in your profile, or in messages) as a "kick-ass" ANYTHING. A few years back, the OKCupid blog posted a really helpful index of what kinds of messages get responses — and which ones don't.

Let me tell you, nobody on that site is reading it. There's lots of good stuff here — write using real words and real sentences; don't compliment their looks up front; bring up specific interests.

It is best to write an initial e-mail or instant message (if that option is available) that will arouse the respondent’s interest and make him or her want to contact you to learn more.

Your first email serves as your pick-up line with the added benefit that you can design this e-mail based on information that is given to you in their profile.

You might as well find out right away if your senses of humor* line up.*Bonus advice: Please don't just write "I have a good sense of humor" and expect everyone to believe you. It's good to express enthusiasm for shared interests, but don't make them up, and don't be weird about it.

You can only get so excited about both liking pizza. ), is really into the idea that guys' messages to girls' should assume brain-deadness on the part of the recipients: "You need to make it easy for women and help them think to avoid ending up with message abandonment issues," he writes, suggesting that guys send girls messages that ask questions but also partially answer them, so it isn't too hard or whatever. Though much of what you'll find among internet advice on internet dating is bad, some of it is pretty spot-on and helpful.

Both of you can decide when to go offsite to y our personal e-mail or phone or in-person meeting.