The thing about grown-up love is this—we are not going to be able to get it until we learn to be grown up ourselves!When we aren’t being grown-up, we portion the biggest amount of blame onto the other person.After all, the making up afterwards was the best part of all.
I also used to think that love had to be a little messy to keep it exciting.
I believed that without drama relationships were calm but boring, and that it was okay to be a little volatile at times.
One of the most significant things that highlights these types of relationships from others is that both people take accountability for who they are and are able to admit where they are going wrong. They will still have their own problems and troubles to face, but the difference is that issues will be handled with maturity and also good communication.
When someone is willing to put their hands up and accept their flaws half the battle has already been won.
I had been involved in intense dynamics whereby we foolishly believed at the time that if our relationship ended, our whole worlds would crumble with it.
Now, I see clearly how juvenile that was and how it was keeping us in a parent-child dependency rather than allowing us to function as two grown adults.
Conversation flows freely whether it is about trivial subjects or deep and intense emotions—nothing is off limits.
A relationship that is an adult one totally understands that the two people involved in it will not offer all that they need.
Although the warning signs were there from the outset, I chose to be blind to them and continue dating them anyway.
Partly because I used to be a firm believer that love was capable of conquering all, and also, because I didn’t want to accept that the handsome, charming, funny guy at my side wasn’t capable of “adulting” in a relationship!
We wrongly believe it must be everyone else’s fault the relationships we’ve been in haven’t worked out. We have to become the type of person we want to be to be able to attract the same qualities in another.