While awkward, be polite and learn to set boundaries for yourself and for them as a divorced couple.
On the upside, everything in his life is pretty much figured out—kids, house, finances, and all that. Be prepared to have conversations about his ex, especially if the divorce proceedings are underway. ” He’ll answer stoically with, “I talked to her *the soon-to-be ex-wife*, and she wouldn’t agree to the terms of the divorce.” Then he might go on an angry and bitter tirade of how selfish, awful, or stubborn his ex is.Be secure enough about yourself to hear about the ex without overanalyzing things or taking it all too personally. While you lend your support for whatever your boyfriend goes through, you don’t have to know every detail of the divorce and even his past relationship.[Read: 9 easy things you can do to get his mom to adore you] #10 You may feel judged by his kids. Having kids of his own already, do you think he’s ready/wants more kids with you? [Read: 50 relationship questions to test your compatibility] #13 He may be traumatized. Perhaps his ex-wife has an addiction or mental disease *well, some guys would say their ex-wives are crazy*, or the whole marriage has been disastrous.Either way, no one comes out of a marriage unscathed.Or, maybe they grew in different directions, were no longer meeting each other’s needs, or were waiting for their children to leave home.
Perhaps we simply have more time in our 60s, with fewer family and work commitments, to reevaluate our lives and the people in them.
However, keep in mind that you can’t please everyone. [Read: 9 naughty ways to keep romance alive when you have kids] #12 What about your own future kids with him?
The important thing to focus on remains your relationship with your boyfriend, which should speak for itself in the end. Tread lightly in this department, because you consider both their well-being without overstepping any boundaries offending them and his ex-wife. When dating a divorced guy, you also have to think not only of his kids *if he has any* but also the idea of future kids with him. Some divorced guys with kids don’t want to have any more kids so you have to include this into the equation.
If he still lives in his house where he used to live with his ex, then you’d have to be prepared. They will judge you and even stack you up against his ex.
Walk through that stage where they will look you up and down, as well as talk about you behind your back. So you have to learn to adjust to a new, and perhaps strange role of being like a stepmom to his kids. However, if your goal in a relationship is just to enjoy the dating part and are not ready to have instant kids, rethink going out with a divorced guy.
He may also be having a difficult time adjusting to a new relationship after a failed marriage.