And you might have questions or feelings about that relationship, too.But don’t let that stop you from pursuing a good thing with a widow or widower.“For someone who wants to be in a serious relationship, dating a widow or widower is an advantage,” says Susan Shapiro Barash, author of Second Wives: The Pitfalls And Rewards Of Marrying Widowers And Divorced Men and a professor at Marymount Manhattan College.
ating someone who’s been bereaved can be a delicate situation.Naturally enough, they may still have strong emotions tied up in their previous relationship and its untimely end.When widowers decide to enter the dating waters after the death of their spouse, they’re often fighting feelings of whether or not they’re ready to date and if they can make room in their heart for another woman.This often makes widower hesitant to take the lead.If you’re looking for a serious, long term relationship with a guy, zip your legs and wait to see if it’s you he wants or sex.
If a guy’s looking to use you just for sex, he can only put a seductive façade for so long. Better to be cautious and make sure the widower is serious about you then to end up with a one night stand and regretting it.
If you are excessively available, eager to please, quick to meet his needs, and reluctant to express your feelings or needs, you will deny him the opportunity to sacrifice for you.
This will turn him off to you and the relationship, due to your lack of faith and trust in him, while also preventing him from developing deep love for you.
With widowers, having to decide to ask you out or plan a date forces them to come to grips with their internal struggle of whether or not they’re ready to date again and whether or not you’re worth it.
(See #1.)Keep in mind that this applies to the early stages of a relationship where men need to decide if you’re worth it.
As the relationship becomes more serious and you become more comfortable with each other, then you can step in.